Montreal, Canada — Following in the footsteps of Christopher Nolan’s cinematic feat, The Odyssey, adult film powerhouse PornHub announced the release of the first porno shot entirely on IMAX.
Also centering around a great character from the pantheon of ancient Greek storytelling, The Oedipussy promises a modern take on the Athenian tragedy of Oedipus Rex, who, through the machinations of fate, unknowingly fulfills the prophesy of murdering his father and sleeping with his mother.
Early-access screenings showcased a scene of Oedipus’ encounter with the Sphincter, a mythical creature with the head of a woman and a huge ass, who presents the flawed hero with a riddle: “What walks on four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three in the evening?” Being blessed by the Gods with both intelligence and girth, Oediups responds: “The answer is me, who crawled as an infant, walked upright in adolescence, and as a man bears a third leg which hangs down from his crotch.”
So far, test audiences have praised the project, with one pervert calling it “single-handedly the best film of the year.” Conversely, critics have lambasted the creative liberties taken by director Dick Shaft, with the loudest complaints painting the costume design as more akin to modern fantasy than authentic Theban panoply. In a curt response, Shaft said only that “if people come out of my movie fixated on anything other than the fat-knocks and hard cocks, I haven’t done my job.”
Cinephiles seeking the best peeping experience should look for theaters that offer viewings in IMAX 70mm and allow blankets to be brought in. That said, PornHub has assured those unable to book one of these exclusive screening that the final film will be edited without compromising the traditional viewing experience of a phone held precariously in your non-dominant hand.
